Building Healthy Resiliency for Your Military Family

Serving in the armed forces is a challenge for everyone who joins, but it can be especially hard on those who didn't sign up but were swept along with it anyway. A service member’s family serves with them. Full stop.

As a military family, you face tough circumstances. Unpredictable futures make it difficult to plan ahead, grow in your career, or just get your kids the help they need in school. Your family has to learn and build the skills of resiliency. Said another way, being resilient means you adapt quickly to new situations and environments.

But don’t confuse resiliency with having to be “OK” all the time. Resilient people are often labeled as strong, happy people, but the second they become unhappy, they feel they have "lost" their label. It’s not healthy to continuously put others’ needs, even your family’s, before your own.

This doesn’t mean you come first all the time. It simply means that it’s okay for you to have feelings. It’s okay to ask for help, to take a mental break, or to go to therapy. Being resilient doesn’t mean nothing bothers you; it means you have the skills to adapt and survive, and sometimes that means recognizing you need help.

Here are two organizations that can help your family build the resiliency skills needed to thrive in a healthy way.

FOCUS Program (Families OverComing Under Stress)

It’s always better to be proactive than reactive. The FOCUS program is meant to teach you resiliency skills before you need them, though the skills can help at any stage. They teach families to navigate challenges by focusing on five main areas: emotion regulation, communication, problem solving, goal setting, and managing trauma and stress reminders. The program offers multi-session trainings for the whole family, group workshops, or private consultations.

Operation Hero at the Armed Services YMCA

Military kids deal with more stress, inconsistency, and uncertainty than many adults. That’s where Operation Hero comes in. It’s a 10-week after-school resiliency program run by the Armed Services YMCA (ASYMCA) for kids in grades 2-5.

The program provides homework assistance, a snack, and mentoring tailored to help military kids with the unique challenges they face. It creates a space where they can learn to cope with feelings and challenges that their civilian peers may not understand.