Relocating comes with many stresses for military families to manage, but military families have an impressive way of adapting. Creating tips and tricks for staying calm during the stress of a PCS is one of those magical military ways.  

Family spoke with Angela Litteral who is married to Andy Litteral. Captain Andy Litteral is an O6 active-duty Navy Seabee, currently stationed at Amphibious Construction Battalion ONE (ACB -1) on Naval Amphibious Base Coronado in Coronado, CA. They have 3 children: Audrey (21), Austin (18), and Annabelle (14). 

How many times have you PCS’d? 

We have PCSed 10 times and are preparing for our 11th one this summer.

What are some of the biggest stressors that you have had to deal with during a PCS?

Some of the biggest stressors have been finding a new place to live, navigating the transition for our kids with new friends and schools, figuring out how I will work toward personal and professional goals when we move as a spouse, and working out the timeline of our move.

Have the stressors changed with each PCS or are there some that have stayed consistent?

People always ask if it gets easier with more moves. No, because every duty station is different, but you do learn how to better navigate each move. Some of the stressors that stay the same with each move are having to say goodbye to friends who have become like family, the ever-changing timeline of the move, finding new doctors, hair stylists, etc…, and finding that new place to call home. However, the most difficult thing that has changed over the years during our PCS moves is that, as my kids have grown up, it has become much harder for our kids to leave good friends, great schools, and communities they loved and reestablish themselves in a new town and duty station.  

One thing that has made our PCS moves easier was three tours ago when our family chose to do a PPM, or DITY move, during the pandemic when there were few movers available in our area, and we were tired of having items lost or destroyed in PCS moves. We found it lowered our stress because we were better able to control the timeline of the move and how things were packed. This gave us all more peace of mind and has been a positive bonding experience, as the whole family works together to pack up the house. We are getting ready to complete our third PPM this summer. 

What are ways that you and your family deal with stress and are there any techniques to help stay calm when the stress is there?

Some of the ways our family deals with the stressor of moving are that we start talking about it as a family as soon as we have orders and have the kids be a part of the planning. For example, we talk about cleaning out things they don't want anymore. Can they give the items to a friend? Do they want to sell them and save for something new? We include the kids to help with research of the new duty station. Planning something fun as we travel to the new duty station helps as well. For example, our last move was coast-to-coast PCS, so we had the kids help us plan out fun stops along the way, including stopping at the St. Louis Arch, Grand Canyon, and many little stops along Route 66 to see fun things and experience the places that inspired the Disney movie CARS.  Another way we try to ease the stress is to plan a Farewell Party with friends before we leave, and we often exchange a picture gift so we can all remember the fun we had together. We usually have a bucket list of fun things we want to experience before leaving a duty station to help maximize fun memories before we move, too. 

If you’re on your first PCS, know that MilitaryOneSource is a wonderful place to start. 

Remember to stop, breathe, and don’t be afraid to ask for help from your military family. You are not alone on this PCS Journey.